Monday, September 29, 2008

rest in peace

my patient passed away today at 1.20pm.
though her family members were mentally prepared,
they couldn't hold back their tears.
but actually it's a relief for her to go.
i helped to clean her up and dress her in her own clothes.
normally she will shout 'sakit' (which is pain in malay) when we try to clean or turn her.
but now...
when we cleaned her for the last time, she has no reaction..
she's only 55 years old.
not that old actually.

it took 10 minutes to confirm her death.
when we went in through the curtains around her bed,
the ECG still shows signs of life in her.
but when the doctor came in to see,
it's finally confirmed as the ECG went flat for 5 minutes.
then they told us to take out all the tubes in her and prepare to scrub her, literally.

but at least i overcame my emotion and i appeared strong enough to clean her.
i didn't shed a tear but i feel that my heart's crying.
i feel sad for her.
but never mind, people will eventually die..only determined by God.

hmmm. ya. i think that should be all for this post.
post again next time. :)

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